Time Disconnect

Journal

When I think about creating anything, I assign a time on how long I think it will take and then factor that into “do I have enough time? before deciding if I’ll do the thing I’m thinking about. The problem I run into is a disconnect on how long the time FEELS vs what it actually is.

For example, if I think it might take 20 minutes to make a collage, I’ll turn that into what seems like 45 minutes, to which I’ll usually say “I don’t have time to do that”. Despite knowing I’m doing this and also despite knowing that a time constraint can actually help the work get created, I still let it stop me from creating more than I’d like to admit.

I don’t know how to combat this cause I feel like I consciously know I’m doing it yet won’t correct myself or the make the decision to start the creative process with the acceptance that I might not finish. And that’s ok, I can still create anyway. Even if I can take it 80% of the way there.

Hoping writing this out and conceptually thinking about it can help me adjust this time disconnect I’m creating for myself. I’m the one putting roadblocks on my creative process. Which on one hand is good to know where the road block is so I can adjust it, but on the other hand I’m battling with myself which doesn’t always fight fair and can argue in circles with itself.

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